#Abelard's in for a bad time

[whumpspicelatte]

Nobody Left To Listen - Part 3 - Patience 

Cole introduces us to Layla, takes on a hunt, and leaves his captive to stew. More introspection than expected. 

TW: Mentions of ableism, mentions of violence, whumper’s POV, dehumanization, mentions of future long-term starvation and isolation, please tell me if anything else should go here. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

So the first visit did not accomplish much. Cole had gone down those steps with the goal of taking a look at how his vampire was adjusting to his new situation and setting down basic rules and expectations, and had walked back up not even ten minutes later with undead gunk dripping down his hand. 

It was disappointing. Not his vampire’s predictable activity, but his own instinctive reactions. Cole had killed at least over a hundred vampires over his career by way of careful planning, research, strategy and a cool temper. And all it took was a little mouthing off for Cole to leave his bloodsucker writhing about on the concrete. Disgraceful. He was not some novice apprentice flailing about for the sake of survival. At this rate, Abelard would provoke him into turning it into nothing more than a punching bag, and the whole experiment would be ruined. Letting four measly sentences destroy his composure. Honestly. He knew better. He had learned better. Had been subjected to far worse by both humans and  vampires than some cocky snark from a prisoner, and he had managed to keep his temper then!  

Ten. Minutes. 

As Cole’s bare soles crossed over from polished cork to smooth timber, air hissed out between his bared teeth. Padding down the dimly lit hallway, he turned to the right and pulled out the silver key around his neck, slotting it into the lock and opening the way to the rest of the house. He took care to lock the door behind him. Only when natural late afternoon sunlight hit his kneecaps, the key cool against his sternum, did he let his spine relax. 

Clearly, a new approach needed to be taken. For both their sakes. 

But what? 

His smartwatch vibrated underneath his sleeve. Its surface, unveiled from beneath the soft, thick wool, blinked up at him. 6:30 PM. Right on cue, a familiar soft little body brushed firm against his ankles, twining between his legs and blinking up at him with big blue eyes. Her purr traveled through the fabric of his pants alongside her warmth. 

Pondering the question of how to proceed with his vampire could wait. Cole dipped down and scooped up his cat before taking them both over to the kitchen. Layla’s purr grew as she snuzzled against his neck, claws daintily hooked into the weave of his sweater, her ears tickling his cheek. Unlike any vampire, she did not struggle or claw or bite. Unlike most humans, she never tried to take away his gloves or hold his hands still or mind his silence. She certainly never tried to trip him. Why couldn’t more people be like her? 

Sunlight danced upon the laminate countertops upon which he lowered Layla. She stepped daintily out of his arms and turned around to face him, tail curled around her body. He couldn’t help his grin when he indulged in a brief pet of her fluff before heading over to the refrigerator. It hummed beneath his hands, its light holding the potential to be dizzying in the right time of night, but not now. Now, he just grabbed a can of her favourite pet food and spooned her meal into her little white dish, then set it before her. 

Even the way she ate was polite. 

Though he supposed that the almost dainty manner in which the vampire was going to feed off that girl could be considered ‘polite’, too. In its own way. 

Cole’s elbows landed on the counter, on either side of Layla, hard enough to bruise. Only knitted wool softened the impact. Layla continued her meal, unperturbed by her human’s internal strife. What was he supposed to do with the vampire in the basement? He had a basic outline for what might break down a vampire, but if he went down tonight or tomorrow, then he had a sinking suspicion that he would, once again, lose his temper far too quickly. And then need to leave to let the vampire heal. And then return, get provoked, lash out, leave, and so the cycle repeats. 

That was not a pattern he wished to weave. 

His watch vibrated again. This time, it was the notification connected to his smartphone. Daniel had sent him a text. 

He left Layla to her meal, venturing out to the living room. Beside the coffee table, his smartphone screen cast a dull haloed haze along the shoulder of the long couch atop which it perched. The light blinked out into snooze mode as soon as his fingertips grazed the thin side. Of course, it blinked back to life as soon as he picked it up. In the evening glow of sunset’s slow descent, the screen was now too dark to properly read. His eyes narrowed as he flicked up the brightness to a proper level. 

Henrikson: You there? 

Cole: Where else? 

Henrikson: Smart mouth. Look, I know you’re probably busy with your leech. 

Cole: But? 

Henrikson: The brass have another leech they need down stat. 

Cole: Properties? 

Henrikson: Another category S, this time grade A+, level 7. Going on a feeding spree. Placid before it went nuts.  Brass don’t want me walking in there alone. 

Cole: Because you would get yourself killed

Henrikson: Hey! That’s no way to talk to your elders! 

Cole: Sure, old man

Henrikson: Brat 

Cole: Hello kettle

Henrikson: Hey! 

Cole: Time estimates? 

Henrikson: Anywhere from two days to two months. Pacification if possible; extermination if necessary. 

Cole: Not immediate extermination? 

Henrikson: Used to be a hunter; went double agent for us after turning. No clue what set it off like this. You in? 

He stared down at the screen. Before now, he would not hesitate to leave Layla with her usual catsitter and take off for the hunt, but now he had his vampire. An angry, cornered, dangerous vampire who was only being held back by silver and Cole’s own inability to be enthralled by way of sound. Could he risk it? 

If Cole wasn’t here, that would be at least two weeks in total isolation. No blood, no light, not even a blanket to hide under or a person to taunt on the other side of silver bars. It took ten years before starvation killed a vampire, but the hunger would reach its peak at two months for even the most well-fed vampire used to operating on little blood. A bloodsucker like Abelard, used to draining a whole human body’s worth of blood from unsuspecting victims nearly every night, who was already injured and likely wasting energy trying to escape? It’d be getting hungry by tomorrow, and positively feral in a week. By a month, its body would have gotten used to starvation, though it still would go insane at the smell of spilt blood. 

By his best estimate, that neck wound the hunter had left would heal to full functionality by tomorrow, but the scarring would only disappear in three weeks on starvation mode. 

Should he? 

Had Abelard ever granted its victims any mercy but those which would leave them easier prey? 

Cole would never dream of leaving a fellow person to rot alone in the cold and the dark to starve and drive themself mad for even a single week of isolation. He doubted any human could last so long without even a glass of water to wet their tongue, much less as long as a proper hunt would take. 

But Abelard was not human, was it? 

Cole: I’m in

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

First / Last / Next

Cole and Daniel texting each other is turning out very convenient when I’m stumped on what Cole’s going to do next, or how to prompt him to get from point A to point B. Gotta keep that from becoming a crutch. 

Sorry it’s been so long to get this out, school’s been getting in the way. Busy busy busy. 

Tag List: 

@whimpity-whumpity 

@blackrosesandwhump

@thatfruitymonster

@kira-the-whump-enthusiast

@skittles-the-whumpee

@dulled-ivories

@kixngiggles

@ivycloak

@whumpwillow

@tragedyinblue 

[neonhellscape]

new rt everyone shes a freak whos pretty sure shes been been given the role of rogue trader as an act of divine intervention to eventually replace the godemperor and bring new glory to the imperium which she thinks is dull and stagnant. dont worry about why she keeps marazhai caged in her trophy room like he's bait its not important and completely irrelevant to the fact ive joke nicknamed her simon thresh. has anyone noticed a lot of slaaneshi demons during warp jumps lately

[vancalox]

tay join Marazhai nation challenge

listen much love to the marzipan girlies but personally the real challenge will be not shooting him in the head every chance i get 😭😭😭😭

[madsmilfelsen]

dear mads, do you have any rust fics that you recommend? I fear I have run out.

I’ve been writing like a damn fiend so I haven’t read much (and I typically avoid reading anything i’m writing as to not influence my insanity)

I’m sure I’ve shouted off the rooftops about my love for Dead Flag Blues, @barbie-nightmare-house really is one of the most engaging writers I’ve read with an acute level of introspection I will never dream of achieving. Even though I know roughly where the story is going I’m so stoked to bottle it up and drink it down like cough syrup again and again and again. Detective Indiana Abelard can come kick my ass any day.

No Dominion by rosereddawn (E, rust/ofc need to be logged into ao3 to read) one of my favorite Crash-era reads with a fantastic perspective, gave more depth to the girls of Iron Crusaders than anything the show did for them

under a swollen silver moon by blackeyedblond (M, rust/marty centric) MONSTER RUST MONSTER RUST MONSTER RUST SHAPESHIFTING AU OF MY DREAMS

I think we’re all familiar with the masterpiece The Creeping Woods (E, rust/ofc) by am7f that knocked all three eras out of the park and let us see Rust as a dad again (I wept like a baby for at least two hours after finishing myself)

No Mouth to Scream (T, no pairings) haunting lil piece following “Rust Cohle lies in the dark and dreams of women”

Something Stuck in Your Teeth by enkelimagnus (E, rust/marty) it is not often something can make me blush but boy howdy (a sequel was recently added too!)

What I’d like to read:

The idler wheel is wiser than the driver of the screw by ohnoitsnina (M, rust/ofc, first person pov)

lavender bitters by blackeyedblonde (E, rust/marty/maggie)

Strange Is The Night Where Black Stars Rise by orphaned account :’( (E, rust/reader)

A History of Bad Men by am7f (E, rust/ofc)

something in the night by harryhart (M, rust/ofc)

cornflower blue by blackeyedblonde (G, no pairing)

basically everything @reds-writings has ever posted

shades of black and blue by saintsansa (T, rust/ofc)

The Last Time I Saw You by scioscribe (M, rust/marty)

out of time man by @palmviolet (M, rust/marty, which i’m only seeing now is apart of a series with SIX WORKS IN IT!!!!!)

Snippets/Upcoming pieces I haven’t stopped thinking about

@netherfeildren I know ur working on something that i’m going to sink my teeth into a shake like a rabid dog

A Crash-Era snippet by themilkteeth

A Crash-Era snippet by @argesta

[cawyden-gaming]

Rogue Trader - Party Banter

Unfortunately, party banter in the game is kind of broken - it hardly triggers and I had several cases where the timing/trigger was bad as I had already clicked on an exit or other item what then interrupted the banter. There is also banter for events that haven't happened (yet) or with companions not even present (or recruited).

But there is quite a lot banter in voiced and unvoiced form in the game.

For the voiced banter there are two videos online that you can find here:

Part 1

Part 2

I have gone through the videos and banters and wrote down the timestamps and dialog that features Heinrix (as speaker or if companions speak about him).

You can find it here. (-> opens excel in google drive)

Please keep in mind that I am not a native speaker and while I used the help of (generated) subtitles there were words that I did not really understand (especially with Ulfar). I added a ? in these cases.

Still, it should give you an overview about the (voiced) banter available and where to jump to in the video if you want to listen to it.

There is of course the unvoiced banter too, but that is not featured here.

There is a lot of romance related banter in video 1 and more act/main story related ones in video 2.

There is also a mentioning of absent Achilleas, a master of ceremonies with memory issues, Abelard scolding Heinrix for being interested in the RT, sassy Heinrix everywhere...

Some examples:

Party banter video 2 - time 00:08:09

Ulfar: *growling at Heinrix*

Heinrix:

Thank you, my Lord Ulfar. I'm in good health and I hope you are as well. I am pleased that we are starting to get along.

Party banter video 2 - time 00:41:40

Marazhai:

My mere presence makes you shake with rage – I do not even have to do anything to you... delightful.

Heinrix:

Yes, I … you... damn it! I'm so angry, I can't even speak! Enough! I'll deal with you later.

(-> the VA is evenf more incredible here, you can hear him shaking)

Regarding Heinrix in Commoragh / healing:

Party banter video 2 - time 00:24:32

Heinrix:

Lady Cassia, there is no need to look at me like that. I assure you, I am perfectly fine.

Cassia:

Do I not deserve the truth from you even in this place master van Calox? I can see the flashes of scarlet that accompany your every movement.

Party banter video 2 - time 00:35:12

Jae:

Why are you limping like that? Haven't you healed yourself?

Heinrix:

It is a long process. I could try to hide my infirmity I suppose, but I'm not as accomplished an actor as you are, Shereen

Party banter video 2 - time 00:35:25

Idirah:

Those crazy screams in the lab the whole time I was there, that was you, wasn't it iceman? How did you survive that?

Heinrix:

My fervent desire to boil a few hundred xenos in their skin on my way out of here, proved stronger than death.

So, while he says he healed himself and is fine, he really isn't...

[oldxenomorph]

i finished act 3 last night and phhhwoah. oh my god. oh my god.

but first, thoughts about the end of act 2.

finally met lord inquisitor xavier calcazar.

being questioned by him was legit a terrifying experience. the most nervous i'd ever been playing a game. stop asking me questions, man. in fact, leave me alone.

(which is what the inquisition should feel like. sometimes i think it's hard to get across just how terrifying the inquisition is and this game does a really good job at that. heinrix's presence is already unsettling, but you can still influence him and even he is subject to being surveilled by his boss. me, my retinue, and everyone on my ship is being watched by the lord inquisitor.)

i don't trust this fool. not one bit.

act 3 happened so fast, i completed it in around two days and i don't think i'm ever getting over just how good/horrifying this experience was.

I WAS NOT AWARE THAT THE ENTIRETY OF ACT 3 TAKES PLACE IN COMMORAGH.

aesthetically, commoragh was made especially for me in a government lab.

the team i took: kibella, yrliet, abelard, pasqal, and argenta.

getting worm shoved into in my brain that made me violently sick and hallucinate being on trial by the inquisition? owlcat have you been looking into my brain?

there really was a point where the moment i was alone, without weapons, without armor, sick as all hell, i was like "oh my god i'm never getting out here. i and my retinue really are going to die here."

i was literally so close to actually crying listening to kibella in the anatomical opera and then talking to her again when we were safe in the shrieker's pit. my love was so traumatized and there was nothing i could do. last time i felt this helpless and distraught was during priority: thessia in me3.

(hearing her stumble over her prayers really made me put down my controller and put my head in my hands.)

however, i did chose the taint/distortion option when talking to her. i really want that heretic romance ending for her. please, she is the love of my life, i need her at my side forever.

tervanitas as also made for me in a government lab. traps him under a highball glass and studies him.

this was probably the most heretical i've been all game. i did the quest where you side with the chaos gods to sabotage commoragh. (which, the cutscene where you unleash chaos into the arena and throughout commoragh was so satisfying. every daemon from every one of the ruinous powers just floods the screen.)

which, i also summoned again to vaporize tervanitas and the haemonucli as a sacrifice. sorry, man. i still think you're neat and will find some use for you.

i recruited marazhai. i'm afraid he is growing on me.

especially since our first real interaction you can grab him by the throat and remind him of his place and he enjoys every second it. maybe i will enjoy having him in my retinue.

both argenta's reveal about theodora and achilleas's off-screen fate were. hm. i'll have to think about some more, but i don't necessarily like the writing for these two instances.

i'm glad ulfar and i also do not trust the lord inquisitor. (also, very cool to actually see a wh40k property do something interesting with omophagea.)

i know it's technically more lore accurate to not forgive yrliet because the majority of humans in wh40k have been indoctrinated into the imperial cult and thus believe that all xenos are bad. but i have mass effect brain and am trying to see things from yrliet's perspective. in the end, i forgave yrliet because her desperation to find out what happened to crudarach was also used against her. (also the reveal of crudarach's fate? insanely fucked up and horrifying. it only made me want to help her more.)

also, love that we got an actual harlequin and that they talk in poetry/riddles. oh nocturne of oblivion we’re really in it now. and thanks for helping me escape.

and then i started act 4 but stopped just after everyone talked to me.

my love kibellah is so strong for enduring commoragh with me, i immediately kissed her when we got back.

also, did not expect jae actually being a former guardsman. genuinely surprised to get some guardsman lore. (i really appreciate this game's take on the imperium, i think having it set on the fringes of the imperium allows for it to explore all these topics and issues.)

[vspin]

I love the Fidelio quest so much. It's the first time that the companions see Eva as not so serious (Act 1 was A LOT OKAY??) and it's just so...ridiculous.

Tomfoolery indeed, Abelard.

Okay, she is still serious but there is underlying mockery/fun in everything she is saying.

It is a bad joke you were in on it from the get-go 😂😂

[chemos-factories]

simply cannot be assed to fuss with giving this a title and doing tagging and such on ao3 right now so have an rogue trader fic, featuring my special lil guy getting a big dumb crush on abelard during the prologue

———

Sennaca barely makes it out of the Warrant chamber before another wave of dizziness sends him stumbling. His foot hits the edge of the top stair and he tumbles down the short flight, landing in a despondent heap at the bottom. He doesn’t bother trying to get up. Just lifting his hand to look at it is enough to make his head spin and stomach lurch, especially when he sees the blood still oozing sluggishly from where the Warrant Sentinel had clamped down on him.

“Master Sennaca!”

Sennaca squints at the new shape that’s entered the room, but his vision swims too much to properly make out who it is.

“Throne, you’ve lost so much blood,” the newcomer says as they fall to their knees next to him. Close enough for him to focus his gaze and see it’s…

“Seneschal Werserian?” Sennaca mumbles. “What are you doing here?”

“Giving you medical attention, apparently,” Abelard says before adding a hasty, “Master.”

Warm, if rough and calloused, hands wrap around Sennaca’s and pull it gently up above his head, and then there’s the sting of antiseptic, the feeling of bandages being wrapped.

“What happened here?” Abelard asks.

“I… Kunrad forced me to open the Warrant Chamber,” Sennaca says as he gazes up at Abelard. “He… He was going to kill… He said he only needed my blood… Oh, Throne, I think… I think he means to kill Lady Theodora…!”

Distant shouts float through the air into the room, and Abelard growls under his breath.

“Have you ever shot a rifle before?” Abelard asks as he ties off the bandage and helps Sennaca sit up.

Sennaca hesitates a moment. “I… Yes, I have, but…”

“But?”

“But never at anything that… Bleeds,” Sennaca says. He feels terribly inadequate suddenly.

Abelard’s expression softens slightly, though, even as he presses a rifle into Sennaca’s hands. It’s of decent make and maintenance, if perhaps a little old, and bolt-action where Sennaca would prefer lever - but it’s not the time to be picky.

“Aim for the head,” Abelard says gently as he hands over ammunition next, “or the heart, if they aren’t wearing chest armour. That’ll put them down quick, and with the least amount of blood.”

Sennaca just nods, still dazed. The shouts come again, closer this time, and Abelard glances over his shoulder and drops a hand to the grip of his chainsword.

“Can you stand, Master Sennaca?”

Sennaca frowns, and gives it a try. The whole room spins ominously and he must go pale, because next thing he knows, there’s a surprisingly strong arm wrapped around his waist, helping steady and support him. Abelard guides him gently to the top of the stairs, next to the Warrant Sentinel, and settles him against the wall.

“I’ll try to keep them from you,” Abelard says as he steps back, “I promise.”

Sennaca nods weakly and leans a little heavier against the wall, watching as Abelard turns and moves to make himself a bulwark by the door, drawing his chainsword and revving it to life as he walks. His broad shoulders are accentuated by the cut of his greatcoat. His stride is confident, his stance resolute. Sennaca thinks on the tenderness he treated his wounds with, the gentle worry in his gaze.

Perhaps being Lady Theodora’s heir won’t be so bad, if this is the sort of company he’ll be keeping.

[infatuatedheloise]

after we established a good time for walks, abelard mentioned that he had gone on a walk earlier today that he hadn't invited me on hahaha

I said that I couldn't today because my shoes were unfortunately really painful and cutting into my heels

And he said that it's too bad they hurt because "they're cute, they're really cute" and OMG my brain like short circuited and I didn't even say thank you 😭😭😭😭 I just kept on talking about how they hurt lmfao but he so rarely compliments me/what I wear so this was such a big win :D

and then I said I had a long walk back to my car & he joked that if he had brought his car (instead of biking to campus like he did), he'd offer to drive me, then he joked and said "give me your keys and I'll go get your car for you" hahaha

and before he left he said "I hope your walk is as unpainful as possible" which was cute

[mathlann]

Idira for the Send Me a Character Post!

Idira!!!!!

How I feel about this character

Idira breaks my heart and I wish we had more content with her. On the one hand she is genuinely the funniest character in the game and I don't do plot-important quests without her just because I don't want to miss what she has to say. On the other hand as I've been going over her dialogue again, the way she is just..."but Doctor, I am Pagliacci." Like the ways she's just moved from "cruel and exploitative circumstances" to "the same, but more materially comfortable" so she clings to Theodora and Theodora's memory but Theodora never cared for her. And she's proud of being a psyker, but also it's the cause of her woes and the way she just wants someone to care about her, and if she can't have that, then let her be a tool, so long as the voices are quiet and like....Idira, I've rarely wanted to hug a fictional character more.

All the people I ship romantically with this character

Idira x Vigdis

Idira x Jae

Idira x A beautiful paradise world where nobody bothers her

My non-romantic OTP for this character

Idira and Jae

Idira and Abelard, I wish we got more dialogue with them together about realizing what Theodora did to them.

Idira and Marazhai. Not in the way that they are friends but something in the way she is, by nature kind of anathema to him (she makes Slaanesh stronger cuz of her walking Warp Magnet energy) and the fact that she has just so much shit going on in her life he doesn't even register as a top 10 scary. Fuck off stick bug, she's got 9 demons in her ear at any one time and a ton of self-loathing, there's nothing he can possibly do to mentally or emotionally harm her more than she harms herself. The fact that she bullies him for even trying to feed off her....and it works...Brava 👑.

My unpopular opinion about this character

Less an unpopular opinion and more a massive bitch but the way the fandom treats Idira is so dehumanizing which is incredibly ironic considering her whole arc as a character. Like, the way Idira was and still is villainized by the fandom for the Demondora incident and the way there were waves of people on the subreddit joking about how the best choice was killing her because it doesn't matter that she was grieving, she was a danger to the whole ship and stupid for having human emotions? In the same fandom where Cassia "my emotions can make people kill themselves due to the stolen Xenotech in my chest" Orsellio is wifey, and Heinrix "becomes a one-man Warp Incursion in the chambers of the Rogue Trader because he got too conflicted about his emotions" van Calox is Mr. Darcy? The Warp isn't suddenly less bad because the person fucking it up is also fucking the Rogue Trader, be serious and forreal. And give Idira one million dollars for every post talking bad on her.

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon.

So much of her story is tied up in Theodora but I would've loved to get a better view of Leira as a planet outside Imperium influence. Or maybe not even Leira but just, her perspective as someone born outside the Imperium because the game doesn't hone in on that as much.

[asgoodeasgold]

A Discovery of Witches Real Time Read Ch12

"‘Matthew,’ I said slowly, watching him for any early warning signs of anger. ‘How old are you?’

His mouth hardened, but he kept his voice light. ‘I’m older than I look.’

You were alive in 1536 – I’ve been to the house you had built. Did you know Machiavelli? Live through the Black Death? Attend the University of Paris when Abelard was teaching there?’

He remained silent. The hair on the back of my neck started to prickle. ‘Your pilgrim’s badge tells me you were once in the Holy Land. Did you go on crusade? See Halley’s comet pass over Normandy in 1066?’ Still nothing. ‘Watch Charlemagne’s coronation? Survive the fall of Carthage? Help keep Attila from reaching Rome?’

Matthew held up his right index finger. ‘Which fall of Carthage?’ ‘You tell me!’...

‘I was reborn a vampire in 537'

Matthew Clairmont was more than fifteen hundred years old."

"I'm older than I look" is quite the understatement. The vampire obviously has an excellent skincare routine. He must share his secret.

And also, it's that damn shirt again, torturing these poor buttons, and us.

📷 Sky/Bad Wolf A Discovery of Witches (2018) s1:02 my edit

[ribstongrowback]

Actually I like the fact that Rogue Trader makes you work your ass off for any kind of happyish ending and that even then most of it is bittersweet. The delivery is kinda rushed which is unfortunate, but overall it's good.

Spoilers under the cut for a special mention!

I especially like that if you made the Weserians a noble family they eventually become just like the ones that were here before. Like yeah turns out it's a system thing, maybe having nobles is bad actually and an aristocratic ruling class will always serve its own interests first and foremost.

It also really serves to drive home how tragic (silly) abelard is as a character, a guy who has seen just how idiotic the system is and nevertheless going on to be the most snotty piece of shit in your crew. Big time class traitor this dude. Love him to death.

[nijigasakilove]

Anime of the season and it’s no debate.

Even when it’s just sit down scenes I’m constantly on the edge of my seat and tense because you never know what’s gonna happen next in this show. Kinda didn’t want Jolenta to get involved with Badeni and Oczy because I have a really bad feeling her dad is gonna find out and I’m worried he’ll kill even her. But fuck, sacrifices have to be made to get the truth out.

Did not expect to hear a nominalist mention in here. Ockham and Abelard were two of the biggest philosophical names of the day, and Ockham is where we get Ockham’s razor which is “the simplest explanation is the best one”. As a history and science lover this show is so fun to watch lol

The sit down with Jolenta was so tense. You could feel her wanting to hear them out, but also not wanting to get involved and be labeled a heretic or witch. It’s crazy that if kolbe was in his office instead of the meeting with Piast, she would’ve ratted them out.. it all worked out for the best though since Piast planted those ideas in her head and got her to help Badeni and Oczy.

As a Catholic I love Piast’s line about the bible being the truth, but we might be reading it wrong. You can use the bible to justify almost any heinous deed if you read it without consideration of the social and historical context it was written. In this case, it’s forbidding women from teaching and leading research.

Piast’s backstory was quite interesting as well. It’s crazy how his own family disowned him for wanting to study astronomy! Times have changed. Now you’d get disowned for wanting to study theology lmao. Great episode, have a feeling this is gonna end terribly for Jolenta but I’m here for it.

[xenodile]

It's a shame that almost half of Rogue Trader's party members just kind of suck in terms of gameplay.

Like Heinrix is a melee fighter that's bad at melee because his base stats are bad and if you don't use his psy powers he's just objectively worse than Abelard.

Ulfar has extremely limited gear options, he's locked into a premade build up to level 18 or so, his size makes him a bullet magnet and positioning nightmare, and his signature move just straight up doesn't work. Meanwhile Argenta can have some of the highest damage per turn in the entire game and be a good healer at the same time.

Jae offers nothing that Cassia doesn't do better.

Recruiting Marazhai is more trouble than it's worth if you're not doing it For The Bit.

Yrliet is fine but she only does one thing and her competition is Idira and Pasqal, both of whom just do way way more.

Like you get the 5 best characters in the prologue and chapter 1, and every subsequent character is just not worth switching to.

[bnbc]

as much as I love the tropes about couples who can handle themselves in battle, I have to admit that Isabella's fighting and shooting skills are beyond saving, she is just bad, so bad it's EMBARRASSING, she didn't kill herself in Comorrgah because she was sure she would miss (jk), it's her retinue's shared secret that all weapon Lord Captain carries is the spare weapon, because all she can do is point her finger to the next target and say a couple of words, haha

…but when Jae tried to joke about it for the first time, she was shut up most abruptly, because everyone looked at her LIKE THIS, and Abelard coughed and informed her about Rykard Minoris, and how Lord Captain got a chaos marine's brain vaporized through his eyesockets with the power of her mind.

(he didn't mention how he carried her bleeding body to the shuttle, how no one could fix her until he, grinding his teeth, allowed the inquisition's agent to use his sorcery on her, and how she managed to gather her strength and stepped on the bridge without giving away her state and stood up for her decision to save people of this damned world)

[nerendus]

Okay, finished Rogue Trader, time for my in depth review.

This was my first Warhammer 40k game, and in terms of just how good it is to start with as someone who has extremely limited knowledge of the lore, it's very good. As a person who quite likes dark choir and Gregorian chant music and just existing online for a long time, it's kinda difficult to not gather some, albeit extremely out of context, snippets of the lore, but this game does it really well that you can go in completely blind and still be able to understand what was going on.

Before I go over the negatives of this game, I naturally have to bring attention to many of the positives.

The true highlight of this game was easily the companions. I was unable to grab Ulfar due to a bug and I got rid of Marazhai when I realised "oh no, he's going to be an awful person to all my canon lovers," but everyone else I loved dearly. Cassia....least of all, her whole thing got boring very quickly, and Yrliet was cool but her combat dialogue made me very annoyed with her. Yes, you are not my xeno pet, now can you please shoot that celestial being that is trying to kill all of us?

Everyone else, I have no complaints with. Argenta was very extreme, but in a sort of endearing way. Idira's story made me so sad, and I'm glad I was able to give her an ending where she lived a happy life. That bit of Jae taking her to go see the void whales nearly brought a tear to my eye. Heinrix...I like to make fun of him and call him a snitching bitch, but I do genuinely like him. It's just I like him in a way that I constantly want to bully him because I think it's funny. Jae and Pasqal are legally both my wives and I don't care what canon says. Abelard...Abelard is my Kim Kitsuragi. Most of my choices in the game were based around if he would approve or not. I wasn't able to give most of my friends the best possible outcome (tbh at a certain point I stopped trying), but just being able to send that old man off peacefully surrounded by people who love him was the greatest feeling in the entire world.

In terms of gameplay, naturally my favourite part was the space exploration. Finding new worlds and uncovering their ancient pasts...it was all so much fun. More on that in a moment.

The story towards the end did begin to bother me, but there were two moments that really made it worthwhile. First, the final goodbyes to all of your friends. I don't know how different the conversations would be if you were an asshole to them, but being on good terms with everyone really just warms the heart. Being able to hug Idira, Pasqal saying he was glad to travel with me, Abelard........being Abelard. The only thing I would change is that I think, as Lord Captain, I should've been able to order a group hug. I loved them all so much and I truly think they should've at the bare minimum hugged (bare maximum: best orgy the Expanse has ever seen).

The second part was...the ending sequence itself. I did the Iconoclast ending with my lovely son Nomos, and that whole sequence of the Rogue Trader going Go, my sweet summer child and watching my son becoming a literal god was great. I had...a few concerns throughout the game that because I played a good person I would get a bad ending since the Dystopian Fascist Government That's In Denial That They Are A Dystopia would naturally try to off my girl, but Nomos coming in clutch to save the Expanse was amazing. If Iconoclast had been a certified bad ending, especially after all the bullshit that happened in Act 3 and beyond, I would have been so pissed. Having a satisfying ending, however bittersweet it may be, made the difficult and stressful journey worth it. Warhammer 40k: Rogue Trader was my Mordor, and I was Frodo Baggins and Abelard was Samwise Gamgee.

In terms of endings.....I did okay. Abelard got the best ending, Idira did as well though she didn't reconcile with Vigdis or Argenta--if someone can explain how you do that, especially Vigdis, please tell me I'm curious. Everyone else....lived a life. Heinrix got assassinated, Jae got assassinated, Pasqal became a heretic which I think is hot of him, Yrliet was killed by Pasqal which is honestly kinda funny, Cassia...I didn't care enough to actually read her ending but I think it was okay.

I was only really trying to get good endings for Abelard, Idira, and Pasqal because naturally they were the characters I got the most attached to. I was initially trying with Jae, but after I realised that after Act 3 you can't go forward with romancing her, I was so fucking tired of this bullshit that I gave up. Everyone else I did make an effort to help them, but I didn't care that much about getting the perfect ending for them.

So...now is time for the negatives. First one is the one that I've mentioned a few times, and that's the story. Up until Act 3 I was deeply immersed in the story, I really liked where it was headed. But once you get to Commorragh (which I will now refer to strictly as Low Budget Tower of Latria) it starts to fall apart.

The very beginning was great. The Rogue Trader being mentally tortured and struggling to get by as she searches for her comrades that have also bear witness to the Horrors. Finding out the different ways they were abused at the hands of that....fish....elf....mermaid....thing was great. And the idea of then going to try and get revenge on the fuckers who tortured you was also good but it just...kept...going. The battles were just so boring, and the dungeon just kept spiraling on in a way that wasn't fun at all. It doesn't help that the story also just...wasn't appetizing. After we gather the crew and Tervantias told us to fuck off, it just became boring. Yeah, those dudes want to see us fight to the death, can I please continue on to the next area already?

I also just have an issue with just how...after Act 3 the torture is only really referenced in idle dialogue between companions. Funnily enough, the only one I got to mention it was Idira and she wasn't even there. Like, I feel like they should have put in at least a little bit of extra effort into placing those events into the overall storyline for the companions that were actually there. Make Abelard sad, Cassia even more of a whiny bitch. Hell, you literally tell Pasqal "hey man, we'll deal with the weird xenotech in your body once we get out of this place" and then it is never mentioned again. It felt so out of place for you to go through literal hell with your best friends and it not have a lasting impact on anybody. At the very least, there should have been the ability that the companions that went to Bad Latria to have new dialogue options open up at the bridge--there's no way you wouldn't have a deeper connection with these folk after all that.

But eventually, Act 3 passes and Act 4...was Act 4. I'm trying to keep my breakdown of the events linear, but I just...really think Act 4 and Act 5 should have been switched, or at the very least, the bosses switched. But I'll get into that in a moment.

Act 4 wasn't terrible. Most of it was just finishing up on companion questlines, and the questlines were genuinely fun to do...except Cassia. Look, at a certain point you lose patience with characters like her, and I just picked options that didn't make me sound like a total asshole. Pasqal's questline was fun...even though it was hard to keep up with the constant new information and names I most certainly don't remember being referenced. I really wasn't expecting the Truth to be that he is like, robot Moses, I really thought that he was just a septuplet or something. I did really like the twist even though I didn't fully understand it. Argenta's mission was cool. Abelard's was amazing even though I had to enlist the help of the wiki since it didn't really click at first.

There's also the bit on Footfall of making things normal again, and honestly, gathering a squad of bandits-turned-politicians-turned-bandits, pirates, priests, drunkards, to fight against Some Woman was really fun. But...then the inquisitor sends you off to war.

The war part itself was fun, even though it was just a storytelling bit. Grandpa Opticon-22 died, but comparing that to his Alive Ending....his sacrifice honestly just felt far more satisfying than robbing him of his martyrdom. Also, he's Grandpa, his legs must be so tired, he deserves some rest.

But then you get into the facility and the anger just comes back at full force. Listen, I'm not the biggest fan of turn based fights in video games--if I went seeking gameplay like that I'd go play DND--but Rogue Trader had been for the most part not bad though it does get quite repetitive and boring, but the shit on that planet fucking sucked. It wasn't fun. It was over staying its welcome for a really long goddamn time. And then you go fight Urlon and the bird....it's the same shit. It was boring as hell and didn't spark any fun whatsoever. The Urlon portion wasn't that bad, but the bird....man, fuck that bird.

There was a moment after returning to Footfall for answers that I did like, and that was all of the faction leaders sort of wishing the Rogue Trader good luck on her journey. It was cute, but I didn't manage to max out friendship with any of the factions by a long shot. I was aiming for really good rep with the Navy and AdMech since the colony stuff related to them was the most interesting to me, but...alas. Are you able to max out more than one faction? I've heard people maxing out the Navy, but I don't know if the only way to max out a faction is by focusing solely on one or what.

There was that bit of a Star Trek feel when you finally get through that portal and end up somewhere completely uncharted. It felt so magical, but it ended just as quickly as it began. There was only like, four, maybe five systems that you got to explore before you were at the end of the game, which just fucking sucked. The map for the Expanse is so huge and you only get to explore like 1/3 of it that if felt so...unfulfilling. I loved that feeling when I first pulled open the map and thought "Wow! This thing is huge! I can't wait to explore every nook and cranny!" and just for most of that space to go untouched really hurt my explorer brain.

So....the Inquisitor. I really hated how the story handled him. Sort of suddenly and disjointedly at the end of Act 4 the story begins to try and paint him as the big bad mastermind of the game and it just...didn't work for me. If there had been more intrigue...mystery....unanswered questions that just chewed at your brain throughout the game, maybe it could have worked. But really it was mainly just, you go up to this man and he has to explain how every little detail of the game was directly his fault. It did not feel satisfying at all. It just happened, and then he was dead.

I think, even if they kept him as the True Mastermind, he and Urlon should have swapped places. Urlon and Kunrad just mean so much more for the Rogue Trader's personal journey, that I can't help but think they should have been put at the end instead of the Inquisitor. So much of the story had been this sort of quest for revenge, and for the ending to not be a fulfillment of that revenge just feels wrong.

As for the actual final boss, no major complaints. C'tan was a bit....boring. They could've hired their orchestra to have a truly magnificent final boss theme and gave him far more cool and epic moves instead of just...standing there most of the time. I will say, though, I did really like that one attack that puts a bunch of spears in a companion and you can just...have another companion swap places. I think that was really neat.

The other part of the negatives is bugs...but this is already way too long so I'll be quick with this part.

Ulfar just...wasn't able to be recruited

enemies just remaining in their idle poses during fights and it taking upwards to a minute for the game to finally move to another fighter

Stairs.

Idle dialogue not supporting the canon events (Abelard grieving the idea of the Rogue Trader and Cassia being put into a loveless marriage....despite that not being a thing)

This isn't really a bug, but fuck if the camera angles in oddly shaped rooms don't just jerk you around constantly

There's probably more bugs and more grievances I have that I have just forgotten...but this is long and I just want this to be over.

I've wanted to get into Warhammer 40k for years, but with there being so much material and not knowing what would be a good starting point as someone with no knowledge, this game was a godsend. There's very certain things that I'm very much into about the universe: AdMech, the Necrons, the Elves all specifically and having now the basics to go forth I know what I want to go more into since there is no way in hell I'm going to play every game and read every book there is.

I'm not very interested in the Space Marines and the Imperium...but not for the reason you'd think. I don't care that they're facists and their god is a dead dude, it's....just that they look ugly. Not physically, some of them are quite attractive face-wise, but them just wearing this big bulky armour but their faces being exposed just fills me with a rage that even I don't understand. The reason I want to kill the God-Emperor isn't because he created an awful place to live, it's because I saw one picture of him as a Man In Armour and it just made me so mad and now I hate everything he stands for. It's weird, I can't explain it.

But yeah...I'm really glad that I played this game. There's talk of a DLC mayhaps coming, and I have absolutely no desire to play it. Act 3 and beyond just makes the game immediately unreplayable for me, but I am still very grateful that I did play it.

Final score. 6/10.